I am starting this blog because I work with kids and daily I get phone calls from parents who are confused, angry, upset, bewildered or just plain tired!!
Raising children is hard enough but when you add in the challenges that come with navigating the issues with a youngster with special needs the issues become complex and often confusing.
In a rush to fix things...isn't that what mothers are supposed to do???? I hear about a lot of money being spent on fake promises ....
*your child will gain 6 months of skills in 6 weeks!!
*this program is totally fool proof!!
*we can train your child to succeed!
Golly if they can really do all those things why are they advertising??
I know as a parent I would have been camping on their doorsteps and promising the moon to help my child quickly and completely!!
But alas, after 3 kids and umpteen tutors, and a lot of money spent on testing, some helpful some not, I have found that nothing works like work.
What that work is depends on the child. But none the less it is work. It is what we as parents need to do, and what we need NOT to do. Both are equally important!!
One thing I did learn is that parents cannot be therapists, and they cannot be tutors. At least not in my case. It blurred the lines between nurturer and "demander".
It made the the relationship with one of my children one where I was more about getting "it" done --the end product--get this assignment in on time--and less about the process which is all about what learning should be.
One thing parents CAN do is be supportive, loving and structured. Let your kids know where the boundaries are. Nothing gives a kid security like knowing what is expected of them to do and not to do.
I used to say to my kids "care--share--and obey"--care about yourself and others, share things and feelings and obey the rules (mainly me).
So as a veteran mother, Occupational Therapist and advocate, I share this blog so we can grow together and perhaps I can take the fear out of different and put fun in instead.
I will be talking more!! BE Brave!! Susan N. Schriber Orloff, OTR/L
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